What is the main consumer, not buyer of LaCroix?

You can eat ice cream on the couch, as long as I fart in it.

I made people quit at the skate park regularly

I lost the pizza competition, but only due to my lack of knowledge dealing with dairy

Oh, that was the last one? I didn't know!

It's taboo to break wind at the dinner table unless you are?

If you are watching a show you like, I'll be sure to ruin it.

I get people to buy video games, only to play other games

I like milk, milk doesn't like me

I thought that was my peanut butter!?

I promised to buy groceries, but the fridge is empty

The pig attacks me, the kitties love me.

Your septic is full

A potato a day, keeps the vodka in play

You wanted to use the washing machine? It's holding my clothes I wash twice a day though...

Cabinets are for plates, and.... Dick powder?

I'll decorate your house with open top spitters

The shoes don't go in the shoe rack of you're me

Fry it or fuck it, just gimme that chicken crumblet.

I'll gladly pay you tomorrow for a dip I can have today.

I don't do dishes, just dirty them.

I pass out here, only to puke in the stairs

If we're playing best ball, we're not playing mine

If your prepping food, I'll spice it up a little.... with airborne poop particles.

Christian Bale is my true idol