Mindfulness | Communication | Miscellaneous IE | Making Requests | Mindfulness of Others |
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What is Wise Mind?
A balance between Reasonable Mind and Emotion Mind.
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What are the three goals of interpersonal effectiveness?
Objectives (ask for something effectively)
Relationship (maintain positive relationships) Self-respect (maintain your self-respect) |
???
Challenge the following worry thought: If I don't do what she wants, she won't want to be my friend.
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What is validation? Give an example from your own life of how you have validated someone in an important relationship.
Finding a bit of truth in another person's perspective or situation, verify the facts of a situation, acknowledge that the person's emotions, thoughts, and behaviors are understandable.
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What are Observe, Describe, Participate?
Mindfulness skills that make friendships last longer.
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What are the 3 goals of mindfulness practice?
1. To reduce suffering
2. To increase control of your mind 3. To experience reality as it is |
Assertive communication
What is walking the middle path and having balanced interactions ("I want -- They want")?
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What are common blocks to listening?
mind reading, rehearsing, filtering, judging, daydreaming, advising, sparring, being right, derailing, placating
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What is negotiation? Provide an example.
HOW: Relax, Avoid, Validate, Examine, Neutral voice
TYPES: I'll cut, you choose, Take turns, Do both, Trial period, My way when I'm doing it, your way when you're doing it, Tit for tat, Part of what I want, part what you want, Split the difference |
What is an Open group?
Everyone is standing somewhat apart in a group, members occasionally glance around, gaps in conversation, members talk about a topic of GENERAL interest.
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What is: Observe, describe, participate AND non-judgmentally, One-mindfully, effectively? Must provide examples of each!
WHAT and HOW skills of Mindfulness
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Group's discretion
Give an example of a worry thought/Unhelpful belief that might stop you from achieving an interpersonal effectiveness goal.
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What are skills to use when someone is not listening to you? (i.e., coping with conflict).
Mutual validation, Broken record, Probing, Clouding, Assertive delay
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What are the steps to making a SIMPLE request? Provide an example.
1. Brief justification
2. Softening statement 3. Specific request 4. Appreciation statement |
What is the Describe skill in an interpersonal interaction?
Replace judgmental words with descriptive words; Avoid assuming or interpreting what others think; Avoid questioning other people's motives; Give others the benefit of the doubt.
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What is the "hypothesis about how the human brain evolved and functions" (Lizard brain, mammal brain, human brain).
The Triune brain theory ("flipping your lid").
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What is an example of Passive communication?
(e.g. pulling away from a relationship rather than saying anything that could be upsetting.)
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What are factors to consider when deciding how intensely to ask for something or say No?
Capability, Priorities, Relationship, Self-respect, Self-respect, Rights, Authority, Relationship, Goals (long-term vs. short-term), Give and take, Homework, Timing
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What are the steps to make an ASSERTIVE request? Provide an example.
I think...
I feel... I want... Self-care solution |
What are good conversation skills?
1. Ask and respond to questions
2. Make small talk 3. Self-disclose skillfully/appropriately 4. Don't interrupt 5. Learn things to talk about through observation and experiences |
(SM3)
Why is "the breath" and intentionally breathing important (3 reasons)?
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What is the percentage of types of communication in an interaction?
7% - words
28% - tone and paralanguage 65% - body language |
What are your Legitimate Rights?
You have the right to: need things from others, feel and express emotions, be the final judge of your beliefs, your opinions and convictions, your experience, protest treatment or criticism that feels bad, negotiate for change, ask for help, say No, not take responsibility for someone else's problem, choose not to respond to a situation, inconvenience or disappoint others sometimes
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??
Using IE skills, Role play: You ask your boss for a raise. OR
Ask a coworker for a ride home for the 4th time this week. OR...? |
Role-play: an ideal way to join an open group conversation. (Props: an open group and an individual to approach the group)
Wait for a break in the conversation, stand beside a friendly-looking member of the group, and say something like "may I join you?"
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